What You Focus On, Expands
Published November 12th, 2007 in Psychology, Success, Law of Attraction, Life, Thoughts. 
I was on the train. The lady sitting next to me has been complaining to her friend over the phone about his husband for more than 15 mins, while I became a forced audience.
If was pretty annoying - but this also led me think: what you focus on, expands.
I don’t really know whether her husband is a nasty person, but from the conversation that I overheard, the complains were all about minor stuff.
When you focus too much on the negative, the minor issues would be amplified and overcast the positive attributes. When you put enough attention on the shortcomings of a person, you form a general negative impression of that person, which is hard to rectify. As a result, consciously or unconsciously, you become demanding and unapproachable to that person and in view of your negative response, that person would easily become defensive / lack confidence to perform well in front of you. A negative circle.
The moral?
If you want to improve your relationship, stop focusing on the shortcomings of your spouse and pay more attention to his / her good deeds. Before long, you will notice that he/she loves you more than you previously thought.
If you want to enjoy your work more, stop complaining about your boss, the colleagues, the suppliers and the clients. When you can put yourself in their shoes, you will find that their request were not all unreasonable.
If you wanna to learn sth new. Think about how it is going to help you when you have acquired the knowledge / skill and the hard work will suddenly becomes manageable.
If you want a break-through in your life, stop focusing on the (possible) obstacles ahead. Instead, focus your attention on discovering solutions. When your mind is pre-occupied by worries, you can easily scare yourself off. Achievements can never be attained through giving up.
Related posts:
- Why Complaining Is Hazardous To Your Happiness?
- Good Karma
- Why Not Just Say THANK YOU?
- Be A Class Act
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I like your view on this expansion on things we focus on. It is really a down-to-earth statement. Yes, we should make our life more pleasant by looking and thinking of the good things rather than the negative aspect of life. Relations are hard to come by. Why waste time to destroy them by focusing on the wrong issues? Let’s look on the bright side. Thanks for sharing your wonderful view in this post. Have a nice day! Cheers!
Hi there Irene,
Thanks. Yet, life is short - why not enjoy the good?
Amen to that one.
I was just talking about this issue with a close relative recently. Well written and incisive. 
I find that this is particularly true when I am reading online. I sometimes go to site after site looking for something valuable and I keep on clicking because I am prejudging everything I see. It is only when I slow down and read carefully, that I see my favourite sites are loaded with good material. I go to DumbLittleMan and learn something cool, then I visit Project Armannd and get some new insite. Next I look up Skelliewag for some inspiration and then I end up here and you have written another great article. When I focus on good content, it expands.
Thanks
Tom
Thanks Jon and Tom!
Prejudging - thanks Tom for mentioning this. Many times our perspectives limit ourseleves. Also, in some occassions we like to say “it’s always like that.” But it’s always like that doesn’t mean it will be like that forever. So if we don’t get ready for a change / an opportunity - we can miss a lot.