Shine With Grace

They are not happy.  They just think they are happy.  (Cartoon by Andrew Matthews)

Surfing Steve Pavlina’s blog for some inspiration and found this article named Feelings.  Rings my bells. 

Our feelings are a natural response to our thoughts and intentions.  We don’t really choose our feelings directly.  Our feelings are a feedback mechanism.  They indicate whether we’re moving into alignment with our true desires (positive feelings) or out of alignment (negative feelings).

Feelings as feedback

Just like pain can alert us about danger and that there is something wrong, Feelings also serve as a feedback, they let us know whether we are moving along the right direction.  Simply put, we feel bad when we are not getting what we want. 

Steve Pavlina suggests us to find out the source of our feeling bad - was it influenced by others or stems from ourselves.  If it stems from ourselves, try to identify the source and rectify accordingly.  Once you’re again aligned with your true desires, you’ll start to feel good again.

Be honest with yourself

Not getting what we want let us feel bad.  Not acknowledging / allowing ourselves to want what we want let us feel even worse. 

Often what traps us in negative emotion is that deep down we know what we want, but we don’t think we can get it.  Sometimes we also don’t feel we deserve it.  So we tell ourselves maybe we shouldn’t want it.  Please don’t do that.  It never works.  You cannot NOT want what you want.  If you want it, you want it.  Trying to deny your desires is only going to piss you off.  You really need to do the exact opposite of that.

We are supposed to feel bad, especially when we have a new desire - for we are not getting it yet.  The bad feeling is good for us for it calls for action.  Mostly due to fear - fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of pain etc., we like to deny what we want.  In order to stay away from the burning desire, we rather suppress our true feelings.  But, the crunch is - you are only hold that long - you know it deep inside that you want it, your suppressing your own feelings add pressure to you and your withdrawal from action would only sabotage your chance of getting what you really want. 

So what to do?

If you’ve been feeling bad lately, recognize that it’s because you want something you don’t currently have.  Want to feel even worse?  Try pretending you don’t really want it, assume you’ll never get it, or imagine you don’t deserve it.  Want to turn it around and feel fantastic?  Step fully and completely into that desire, and bask in the energy it summons.

Be brave, be honest with yourself, allow yourself to dream that dream, feel the desire and take whatever action it takes to get that thing you want.

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